June 22, 2015, 2:52 pm. ), how much heads up will you need for said days off, and so on. But this is at least something you can try. I figure if he gets here safely, who cares who I used? It would be an equal problem if they were feeding the baby formula, and it was working perfectly for them, and the MIL kept making comments about her poor grandson who wasn’t being raised right because the LW was too lazy, stupid, selfish, etc. That is often found through trial and error. My mom didn’t approve of any of that. I don’t think all women feel the need to defend their decisions. That being said, itâs not easy dealing with in-laws that you do not trust with your baby. If I saw my sister running herself ragged with a new baby, I would repeat that I would happily babysit every time I saw her, because her refusal might be because she doesn’t want to inconvenience me, or be a bother, or “it’s not that big of deal, I’ll shower and sleep eventually”, or she thinks she needs to be supermom and that good moms never leave their children with anyone other than a parent. I think I would go crazy if I had to wash bottles all the time and always have a clean one on hand. And without good communication, it’s easy to let every little thing fester. I do think that those who feed formula don’t understand the way breastfeeding works and so they make assumptions that are problems for breastfeeding. — is your overall well-being, your comfort in your role as a parent, and your trust that your child is going to be ok, even if things aren’t done perfectly. So far it has worked out really well, better than I expected. I don’t really want to broadcast the specific details, but I think we have very similar MILs with similar personalities and yes. Breastfeeding is a supply and demand type of thing so if the MIL starts feeding the baby formula the baby will breastfeed less and so the mother’s body will make less milk and that can become a crazy cycle where the baby needs formula because the mother’s body doesn’t make enough milk because the baby is drinking formula. BUT the arrangement would have had to come to an end once they got older. Cosleep or not, breastfeed or formula, work or stay at home (or a combo), pacifier or not, etc. “plus I don’t want her aggravating tendencies to rub off on my baby as she gets older.”. As simple as that! The LW is making hopefully educated decisions about what she feels is best for her child. Follow along on Facebook, and Instagram. A lot of women here breastfeed at first and then switch to formula when they go back to work. If this keeps happening the mother’s body will quit making enough milk because it isn’t being used. The MIL slipping in a bottle of formula here and there would be a problem for the mother and if the baby doesn’t tolerate the formula it would also be a problem for the baby. Having a written plan/routine is also a great idea. It will establish a boundary, which sadly it looks like you will need with this grandma. But once I had my daughter, I couldn’t stand my MIL. Luckily, my MIL lives very far away and we only visit twice a year. The mother’s body will adjust to that and make just enough milk so that the supply is perfect for that situation. I spend my life keeping her from injuring herself and others. I had originally planned to put my daughter in part-time daycare (I work part-time) when she was three months old. I have both my mom and my MIL in my life (my MIL to a much lesser extent than my mom). June 22, 2015, 11:11 am. I know one mom who said they bought the baby’s formula and then ate Kraft macaroni and cheese themselves because almost all of their grocery money was spent on the formula that the baby had to have. I don’t want to hear negative talk about my body anymore “.